So I saw a sign yesterday that said ‘Professional power washing’ which lead me to think wonder why you never see a sign that says ‘Amateur power washing’. Which led me to wonder if that doesn’t make the ‘Professional’ part a little redundant because as near as I can tell porn is the only place where ‘Amateur’ is considered a plus.

Then last night I saw a Town of Cary truck that had a tank on the back that said “Non-potable water. Not for drinking”.  Isn’t that what non-potable water is? Has there ever been a situation in which you would see a sign that said “Non-potable water for drinking”? I can buy into “Potable water. Not for drinking” to indicate that while it’s drinkable water that’s not what it’s intended for. If you’re concerned that your employees are too stupid to figure out what non-potable water is perhaps you could just cut back to “Not for drinking”  and save trying to impress us with the fact that you have a Word Of The Day calendar.

Apparently while we were having dinner last night and I was raving about the Transformers movies because of the acting talents of Megan Fox, my silent plea was heard by He Who Makes Things Right. Megan Fox and Bryan Austin Green are no longer engaged. I never got it since his sole claim to fame was that he was the dancing wigger on 90210 (not that I ever saw 90210… that’s just what I heard). I mean, seriously, there’s this:

Who was going to marry this:

But it’s OK now. I’m here for you Megan.

One thing that I was really hopeful of with the new administration was that Obama seemed pretty hip to the technology. I mean he’s got a Blackberry, right? I really hoped we could move away from the Shrub administration’s embrace of Dark Age style Idiocracy. Then the VP goes on TV to pimp the government’s recovery.gov, can’t remember the address and explains that he’s forgotten the “website number”. Where the fuck does Washington get these people? My mother is two years older than Biden and not the backup to the most powerful man in the world and she understands the internet better than he does.

This, of course, misses the point that he was going on the show to talk about the website, shouldn’t a properly prepared 4th grader have the address?

I was having a conversation with a customer the other day and the subject of trucks came up. If you really want to cut the output of noxious airborne pollutants let’s not worry about Google and instead worry about something that makes a real and definite impact. Trucks. The culmination of the conversation that I had was that there are almost no cases in which it’s required to use a truck to haul goods across the country (or more than a hundred miles or so most places in the East). But to pull something like that off we’ll have to completely change the way business is done. [Ha! didn't use the word paradigm in that sentence at all]

The problem is that companies have gotten used to the idea that they can order something and have it in 3 days regardless of where it’s originating or going. Transit time on rail is calculated as 24 hours plus 8 hours per hundred miles. [MATH ALERT!] So a boxcar from LA to Boston should take about 10d 21h based on the Amtrak route mileage from LA to Boston of 3263 miles. A tractor trailer can legally cover the LA to Boston in roughly 4d based on 44 hour driving time listed in Google Maps. The average truck will use about [hang on I have to break out a spread sheet to do the math for me - ok I'm back ] 398 gallons of diesel fuel to make the trip. A train can haul the same amount of freight with about 168 gallons [I think, math is hard and my head hurts a little].

To be fair (there’s always a catch isn’t there), according to the American Trucking Association, trains use high sulphur diesel and trucks use ultra low sulphur diesel and trains are generally much dirtier as far as emissions go. I’m not sure by how much though and I’m not interested enough to try and figure it out.

At any rate, that’s how most frieght should be shipped IMO. For instance, let’s say there is a container ship that docks in LA carrying, among other things, a container full of  shoes some of which are destined for the Shoe Carnival warehouse in Lebanon, TN.  Probably the most efficient way to do it is the bring the container to a warehouse in LA break it down and re-load the container full of shoes going to Lebanon. Take it to the railyard and load it on a train bound for Nashville. Unload in Nashville and put the container on a chassis for transport to Lebanon via truck. Total distance transported by truck is whatever it is from the Port of Los Angeles to the LA warehouse to the railyard in LA and then from the railyard in Nashville to Lebanon. Otherwise it’s about 2,000 miles.

There are a couple of ways to do it if Lebanon is not getting a full container load of shoes all of which would be more fuel friendly than the current way of doing things.

Here’s the latest in weird business combos and it’s right here in Apex, NC. That’s right Gentlemen’s VIP Barbershop and Bail Bonds. I mean gentlemen need to make bail too, right?  And then when they go to court their hair should be well groomed. Goes without saying…

Over on Techmeme last month there was there was a link to Robert Scoble’s blog about Facebook kicking off Joel Comm, the Internet Marketer. Normally, I’d let this go because I think Scoble is a self-agrandizing dick whose primary field of expertise is self-promotion but his tone was so “hurt puppy” that I have to say something.  Here’ s the thing: you can’t bitch about being kicked off servers that don’t belong to you. If you don’t like the way they’re treating you, take your ball and go home. Don’t sit down on the curb and whine to everybody that passes by.

I’m all for people making money. I’m even all for people monetizing content on the web. Go for it, it’s not 1993 anymore and we should all come to terms with it. The flip side is that the web is almost infinitely more useful now than it was then but in my opinion everything doesn’t have to be monetized. How about if you Internet Marketer type leave a couple of places that are just for fun?

Francine Hardaway also discusses this on her blog in a good deal less hysterical, end-of-the-world fashion.

I have occasion to be in Whiteville from time to time and I’ve got to say that it’s like they took the most unpleasant yankees they could find and moved them all to this one little shit-hole in NC. It’s one of those places where everybody thinks they’re rich because they inherited their house from their parents so everybody in town drives a Lexus or Range Rover. The fact of the matter is that most of them couldn’t afford an apartment in Raleigh but whatever. There are a couple of people who are friendly but at least one of them is from out of town.

And another thing…. it’s the 21st century. Some of you should figure out how to take debit cards. In the real world nobody carries cash anymore because there’s this thing called a phone line that hooks you straight up to the bank like it’s magic.

I mean when the McDonald’s doesn’t put out any condiments or napkins or basically anything and you have to ask for them at the counter you’ve got to wonder if all these people who are acting like they’re so much better than you are stealing sugar to make their iced tea.

I went by Warlock’s yesterday to see when Autumn thought I could change out the barbells for rings and she told me I have to wait at least another month and maybe 2. I have to be able to sleep on it before I can even think about swapping them. *pouts and looks dejected*

I picked up my coffee from McDonald’s this morning and it caused me to think about breakfast at fast food places. Because I thought about it, you have to read about it. I’m going to focus on the Big 3 (around here at least) because I’m lazy like that.

McDonald’s – They have the best all around breakfast. Sandwiches are above average but the egg & pancake stuff is a big win in the fast food arena. They definitely have the best coffee. In fact, McDonald’s is my coffee vendor of choice most of the time. I think their coffee is better than Dunkin’ Donuts. Before the coffee snobs in the crowd get all huffy and leave, I like premium coffees like Starbuck’s and Caribou Coffee but can’t bring myself to spend $4 on cappuccinos and lattes every day and frankly Starbuck’s regular coffee is not that good.

Hardee’s – They have better breakfast sandwiches than McDonald’s but their coffee is undrinkable. I’m not sure what it is but to me there’s a chemical aftertaste. I particularly liked the Smoked Sausage biscuits until I ate too many and got tired of them.

Burger King – BK has the nastiest biscuits on the planet. I’ve never had one that tasted like it was completely cooked. Since I can’t eat their biscuits I don’t have any idea what their coffee tastes like. Too be nice, I’m going to mention that the Iced BK Mocha Joe is pretty good but it’s like $2 for a 16(?) oz cup so it falls into the Starbuck’s arena for me.

I do like Dunkin’ Donuts coffee and one thing I prefer about their coffee over McD’s is that they ask if you want cream and sugar and if you say “yes” they put it in for you in an almost perfect balance. DD is the only place I drink hot coffee with cream and sugar. Mickey D’s is sugar only. Not that you care.

It’s been a month since I got the inner conchs done. In all honesty I can’t say I recommend getting 2 done at once for people with low tolerances for pain. I don’t know if mine are because of getting 2 done at once or because mine happens to be through the thickest part of the cartilage or what but my ear is still a little swollen along the outer rim and hurts like a motherfucker. I still can’t sleep directly on it at all and can only fake sleeping on that side for a little while.

I’m going to go by tomorrow and see if Autumn thinks it’s time to swap in the rings yet or if I should wait another couple of weeks. It’s definitely going to be totally sick when I get the rings in.

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